letter #2 - feb 14, 2023
You know, Sae, you pause a lot when we talk.
I can see your mind racing, not just because you’re speaking in English, but because you consider every word, as if you’re plucking each one from a garden and handling it with care.
It's one of the things I love most about you.
And, when you speak, you have a way of changing my perspective in an instant. A passing comment, a joke, a deep philosophical musing, a random fact - whatever it is, you have a way of making me see the world in a different light. It's like you're a magician, pulling a rabbit out of a hat every time you open your mouth.
Sae, do you know?
Do you know that I laugh when you worry about speaking for too long in your videos when, in truth, I can't get enough of you?
And, do you know how much my heart swells when I envision us, holding hands, strolling together with nothing else to do but to be present with each other?
Do you know how you seem to slip into my every conversation, because you're always on my mind? As if sharing your name might somehow spread a bit of your essence to those who hear it.
And then there are the moments when you allow me to see your vulnerability, when tears stream down your face and your guard comes down.
Do you know in those moments, I love you even more?
Perhaps it's too flowery to say that before I met you, my life was like standing at a train station, yearning to go somewhere, but not knowing where that was.
Or, maybe it sounds like too much flattery to say that your humor is as charming as your body and that your laughter is more like music than sound.
Perhaps it's too silly to say that watching reality TV with you is more fun than watching anything with anyone else. Maybe it's too vulgar to say that you make a tank top look sexier than a model makes a Versace dress and I can’t decide between pinning you against the wall and holding you close.
Maybe you already know these things. I'm not shy about expressing my feelings. Others might say that my sentiments are too much, too poetic. But I don't care what others say because it's true.
So, on this Valentine's Day, know that this is just the beginning. I promise to be with you until the very end, come what may.
Forever yours,
Steven
P.S. Buying me Kouign-amann was a mistake, I’ve already eaten two.